When we begin to make our guest list for our wedding, the most important and first person should be God. And more importantly He should always be present in our marriage.
On our wedding day, we stand before God, the pastor, family and friends. We say we will love, honor and cherish from that day forward. Then the marriage begins, and all the sugar plum thoughts in our head dissipate.
Marriage is really a good thing but its work and you have to show up every day. It's not to be taken lightly. Every situation can't be a 911; and if it is, then God should receive the call. We give the most intimate details of our marriage to everyone but the two most important people, our spouse and God. While at the altar, we declare the three-fold-cord can't be easily broken... until the first disagreement
surfaces. Then the selfish side comes out, 'my way or no way'.
Now over the years, I have learned that thinking like that will not get you going anywhere fast. I have
made up my mind before even opening my mouth that I should go back to the first person on my guest list, God. Through many days of crying out to the Lord I have seen the change in my marriage, it has not always worked out the way the way I thought it should. But I kept trusting and believing that He was working it out for the good of our marriage. In times when I didn't understand, I yet stood still; even in the middle of adversity. I was able to see that God was already ahead me. His thoughts were now becoming my reality. Every good and perfect thing comes from Him.
No way am I saying that I have a perfect marriage, but we have developed ourselves according to what God says in His word about marriage. My husband is the head and I follow his lead, whether I agree or not. When I was single and very much independent, I desired to have a mate. How could I ask God for a man that he called to be my husband, but I wasn't willing to hear him. That's so disrespectful. I had to learn to respect my husband; come into agreement, live in unity and be on one accord. I learned it's not about me.
We go to jobs, churches, social gatherings, and through our day to day routines and submit to
the protocol. We even give strangers a piece of ourselves, then return home to shut down
to our spouse. This is not God's way.
Love is a action word. The way we pursue other people, things, and places, we should pursue our spouses with that same passion. So the next time a disagreement arises, keep in mind that your friends will always tell you what you want to hear (unless you have wise counsel deeply rooted in the word of God). So have a little talk with Jesus - your best guest.
Remember the vows - you stated to love, honor, cherish and to passionately pursue your spouse everyday. Your spouse deserves the best of you, and as you give it to them, you will get the best of him or her. Even if you not quite "there" in your marriage, seek God, pray, and just have a little faith - because you will see the victory in your marriage!
