Many wives have the same complaint, “He isn’t as romantic as he was when we first dated”. As women, we tend to romanticize marriage to our advantage. We look at romance as something we ought to receive. But romance is better when it’s both given and received.
We sashay into marriage dreaming of preparing elaborate meals for our intended. We have visions of running his bath water, keeping his home tidy, baring his children and just being the all around perfect wife. Unfortunately, after the “I Do”, those same dreams morph into nightmares. The very things that we couldn’t wait to do, we now complain about doing. “Make your own plate!” a wife yells. “Pick up your socks!” another demands. What happened? What caused that bright-eyed bride to change into a whining wife?
Much of it happens as real life settles in. When we realize that our prince has smelly feet and can leave other unkind aromas lingering in our palaces, we can kind of give up on the vision. He doesn’t pick up after himself. He isn’t as agreeable as he was in the dating phase. There are mounds of bills. We thought things would be so different. And so we concentrate on all that’s not right with the marriage. Things would be better if… We fall into a pit of complaint. And we stay there; sometimes for years. It’s time we appreciated God for the wonderful husbands that he put in our lives. It’s time we looked at what is right with the marriage. Does he love God? Does he love you and his children? Does he work hard to take care of his family? If so, you should praise God and praise your husband.
Stop living a life of comparison with others. Stop fantasizing about what could be. The reality is that marriage is a mixture of work, laughter, work, adventure, work, cooperation, work and romance. And both husband and wife have to pour into the relationship to make it fulfilling.
Wives yearn for our husbands to romance us. But when is the last time we romanced him? No, he doesn’t want flowers or chocolates. But he would love to be romanced by you. Think about the time when you were a bright-eyed bride. Let your imagination flow. How can you romance your husband?
Run his bathwater.
Make his plate.
Give him a massage.
Encourage him.
Put love notes in his lunch.
Go a whole week without criticizing, fussing or complaining.
Do something special for your in-laws.
Let others hear you praising him.
Get yourself dolled up just for him.
Turn on the sports channel with his favorite snacks and cuddle next to him.
Listen to him without interrupting or correcting him.
Wash his feet.
C’mon Ladies, what else can you think of?
